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Gee, Thanks!


There are those time when I stop and think, “Gee Thanks!” sarcastically.  These incidents stem from one of those Golden Rules: Treat Other’s How You Want To Be Treated.

THE MOVIE THEATER:  I was to meet a family member at the movies, an occassional excursion and expense I partake in.  Maybe 2 times a year I go to the movies, it’s too expensive, too loud and others chatter, have phones that ring, etc.  I just find it a poor experience that I have to PAY for.  Thus, I typically refrain and watch the movies on dvd or t.v.    I arrived at the theater about 5 minutes early almost bought us both tickets, my surprise treat. Instead I decided to wait for their arrival.  I kept waiting and then the movie start time had arrived and I presumed was still showing all of those previews, I phoned the person I was waiting for and the call went to voicemail.  I assumed she was driving and didn’t want to pick up and risk getting a ticket.  I continued to wait and with 3 more calls to voicemail  I began to worry.  20 minutes into the movie I stood outside still waiting, still calling as panic rose inside me.  I envisioned my family member in a terrible car accident, couldn’t answer her phone and might be hurt.  I began leaving frantic messages on her voicemail.

Distraught I drove home and jumped online to see if there were any reports of auto accidents in the stretch of highway between her home and the theaters.  This was not an easy task locating such info.   I ended up taking a tranquilizer, I was so distressed!  I continued to wait for a call or any information.

Hours later I got a phone call that the person I was meeting was both home and pissed off that I didn’t show.  I felt both relief and terrible confusion.  I then thought about the event and what had happened was that she arrived earlier than I had, she purchased her ticket decided to not wait out front as we had discussed.  Went inside, turned her phone off and watched the movie.

I was angry that I was not only willing to wait for her but wait 20 minutes beyond the start of the movie for her, out front as planned and she did not have the same courtesy.

THE BOOK:  A friend of mine and I went to the taping of a popular tv show, at the end of the taping we were all to get a free copy of their latest book.  It was to be mailed to a central location and we would all have to go back there to pick up our copies individually.  (We had been part of an organzied tour)

My friend and I kept calling over the following weeks and no book, I had mentioned I would be happy to pick up her copy to save her the drive (she lives about 20 minutes further away) and I could give it to her over lunch, she was happy with this offer.  The day the books arrived the tour company phoned us all to come pick them up.   She sent me an email letting me know she got the phone call and to tell me the book(s) were in just in case I didn’t get a call. Later, that night (after a busy day)  when I read the email message I offered (again) to pick her up the copy meant for her.  The response I received left me feeling FLAT; ” I already went and got my copy but, thanks anyway”

Uh, did you even think to ask if you could help me out?  Pick up a copy for me?  I guess not!

In both instances, I’ve ended up feeling hurt.  Maybe I am just a big sissy but these are my feelings.  The phrase; “Gee, Thanks a lot for not considering me!” seems to fit.

Conversaton Comando


There is this person…

Whenever we talk, I am rarely allowed to finish what it is I am saying without this person butting in and taking over the conversation and it Always gets steered in their direction, without a breath the verbal ramblings of every tiny detail are vomited up.

While I am working hard at listening to the draining nonsense and  if asked a question or my opinion I think, AHA my chance to talk.  After speaking 5 or 8 words, I am again ALWAYS cut off with the dreaded Yes, But…  and there I am trapped with my thoughts and words shut down inside and held hostage to this person who talks and talks and talks.    I can’t stand this type of person who never seems to listen, is always ready to interrupt and talks endlessly about people I don’t know,  extremely small details that are lost on me after 15 minutes at a stretch without the speaker taking a breath.  If I ask this person a question, any question there is Never a direct answer and actually most of the time the question never gets answered, even if I re- ask.   I’ve mentioned our unfavorable conversation style in the past, nothing changed.  Unfortunately, avoiding this person is my newest approach.

Thank you for letting me get this out, without interrupting.

What do you  think… 

Is this person so self-absorbed or is it just selfish?

Do you interact with this type of person and if so how do you navigate those conversations and people?

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