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Feelings Exposed


We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others

 that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.

 ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Here’s the thing, I have never been good at hiding my feelings and acting like nothing is wrong.  I watch others act with composure when interacting with difficult people and often feel confused as to both How they do this and Why can’t I?

Confession; I watch Reality TV shows.  I know they are not real.  I observe how people interact and react to one another none the less.  It is almost like a type of school, for me.   Their ability to not let others know just how much they’ve been hurt or offended eludes my own abilities and comprehension.  Is this what real people do, how they manage to get along?  Or is this the “show”?  It feels so foreign to me.

On second thought, I know real people who can put up a front and act like nothing is bothering them.   When I was young I was often told that I wore my heart on my sleeve.  Is that bad?  Like playing a game of poker, should I have learned the skill To Keep My Feelings Secret?  And if so, why did I not successfully learn this?  Maybe it is a personality flaw?

I intellectually know that keeping feelings inside is not a good thing but there is that nagging Time and Place issue.   My emotions don’t understand, There is a time and place to express.  I express right then and there and for hours or days beyond.  It seems I have no stop-gap to put them on hold for a more appropriate time.

There is this notion that if you let other’s see how they have gotten to you, that you have validated their efforts and given them your power.

What are your thoughts, feelings?

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2 Comments

  1. It’s a good thing that you wear your heart on your sleeve. People think I am cold hearted because I rarely show any emotion other than happy/excited, or angry/pissed off. That’s not healthy either. I wouldn’t beat yourself up about showing your emotions. That said, there is a time and place, but I think that it can be learnt. You just have to compartmentalise. Or at least that’s what I do when I don’t want to deal with something!! Put it away, lock it away in a dark corner of my head until I have the time to deal with it. But, I guess it helps that generally, for the important things I have a really long fuse. It’s only the little pointless things that annoy me quickly! 🙂

    Reply
    • Have heard about compartmentalize, just never really got how to do that. Love your input and that you have a long fuse. Hugs

      Reply

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