Met the diabetes dr. ( aka Endocrinologist ). feeling helpless, overwhelmed as she talked over my limited options then, talking me into starting insulin. Yes, tears began to trickle then flow. Behind her was a box of tissue, compassion no where on her face, I finally got up to go get the tissue box. Just as I reached it, she turned snatched it up and put it over where I had been sitting. I had to walk back around to get a stupid tissue. And why does she ask me a question, not give me the chance to answer before she starts talking again?? Hellooooo
The only Rx that had worked in the past was highest dose of Actos, which I stopped when the advertisements for Bladder Cancer started appearing everywhere. I had been attempting to manage illness with my primary care doctor for past few years. Now at the Endo, she tried to talk me back onto the Actos. Here are the issues: 1) Most people don’t like taking medicine so, there is that resistance. 2) If a patient is fearful of the medication itself compliance is likely to be poor at best. At least these are my issues.
This office deals with these intricacies routinely and I don’t. When you run through the piles of paperwork you’ve splayed out before me, I might get some of it for the MOMENT. When I’ve gotten home, it has become muddled by various factors including the upset emotions about having to deal with all this stuff.
I don’t understand or can seem to incorporate many diabetes details like, having to wait 2 hours and retesting when I just put some yummy morsel of food in my mouth and the full 2 hours haven’t yet passed. Ugh! Test in morning, it’s High. In evening, it’s High. It’s ALWAYS High.
Left feeling like a number, uncomforted, like a fool and scared as her words bounced around in my head “Your kidneys WILL shut down”.
I have probably had diabetes for 10+ years before getting diagnosed. [ skepticism peaks ]
I will start tonight with a bedtime dose alone, no other doses, for the next week and see what happens. If I feel weak, shaky, like I’m going to drop dead which she said I probably will feel how is this a good thing?!
Bringing own tissues to next weeks visit. I’ll be number 9, if I absolutely have to be a number.